My eyes have been opened to a BEAUTIFUL concept of love! It is inspired from the book 5 Love Languages for Children. The authors explain that each of us give and receive love in 5 different ways: words of affirmation, gifts, quality time, service, and physical touch. This book then focuses on which methods your child specifically needs the most and how to show them the love that THEY need to feel.
Wow! It was so eye opening to read about each love language and how that might be prioritized specifically with Blake. Many of the things in this book are common sense, but it really opened doors with different areas of my parenting.
My love language is words of affirmation. I need to hear encouragement and love through language. Naturally that is how I show love as well. I am consistently telling Blake I love him and how proud I am of him. I shower him with encouragement. That is all great and loving, but it isn't the way that he receives love the most. Blake's current love language is quality time. He sees love by spending time with him. Sitting down and playing on the floor with him for an hour will show more love than me telling him I love him a hundred times a day or giving him a million kisses. So, that means that I will continue to focus on quality mommy/son dates for us!
While gaining knowledge of all of the love languages has also helped me when communicating with Blake. Depending on the situation, I can see how Blake can better understand situations. Especially with discipline, I can see how approaching a situation can help or hurt Blake. Blake is sensitive with words of affirmation. He is SO sensitive. That is why normally the only discipline that he needs is talking and a brief time out. Knowing this reaction and this love language, I can talk to him in a way that he understands in order to teach him about appropriate behavior. We understand each other and can love each other while also still learning.
The book also mentioned that children's love languages can shift depending on age and phases of life. Currently his main love language is quality time, but it might change as he gets older. Being a boy, he will probably distance himself from me when he gets to the almost teen age. I learned how to shift showing the love languages while respecting those phases of his life.
Being a mother is my ultimate purpose in life. It is something that I am grateful for every second of every day. This book has made me value this role even more. My bond with Blake is a special one and I love that I can know grow that bond stronger!
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